Jealousy is the Green-Eyed Monster

About a month ago I decided to delete the subscriptions of blogs, YouTube videos, websites which I felt had a negative impact on me. These blogs and videos started off as interesting and informative to me (and some still are) however the overarching feeling was jealousy and comparison which made me feel miserable… and that had to stop!

Suddenly I felt like that hater who would just visit or watch to criticize  I would have thoughts like “How come she’s famous?! “She’s not that smart!” “Her work is not that good!” “It’s because she’s rich!” Or I would wallow myself in self-pity, “How come my life is not like hers?” “Why is she so lucky?” and the whining continues. It wasn’t a healthy habit.

The more I watched or read, the more out of touch I was from reality. These people worked damn hard to get their writing, designs, creations, styles to where they are. It wasn’t like they became successful overnight! Also it made me more cynical of my dreams, “What’s the point of trying, I’m not as good as them. I’m not good/pretty/talented/clever enough.”

These blogs, websites or videos are not bad and they all deserve their successes however for me they brought out something which I didn’t like, so they had to go. Maybe I wanted more substance…

Of course I’m curious from time to time but I resist! The blogs/websites/videos I visit,  intrigue, inspire and inform me and occasionally just make me laugh! They are also pretty to look at too(!), but they don’t make me want to be “them”, they want me to work on “me”.

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5 comments
  1. This is so relatable to me. I found myself feeling similarly about blogs and YT people. Have you gotten more relaxed and less feeling bad about how you’re not like the others in the time since?

  2. Maria said:

    Ah, yes. This hits pretty close to home for me as well. I compare my life/stuff/self to others all of the time and it never ever ever benefits me or makes me feel good, etc. I try to stay thankful and to enjoy my life and seize more opportunities…i mean, your life is what you make it, mostly.

    It’s good that you decided to do a sort of cleanse, blog-wise. I understand COMPLETELY and I’ve learned to just not follow blogs that seem to trigger those types of greeeen emotions in me. Also: Love the quote from Othello. Really want to read that play

  3. I try so hard NOT to do this but I do. For example, right now one of my best friends has a condo and is engaged, meanwhile, Keith and I are house shopping and working like crazy to know we’ll never have things handed to us and knowing that things are not just coming easy. I get mad. I get jealous, and then I get sad. Kudos to you for acknowleging it and dealing with it. Sometimes that’s harder!

  4. Carrie said:

    Haters inspire me and push me to become bigger and better. However, they do piss me off at times too! Why can’t you just be happy and positive about another person’s present or future? Why do you always have to rain on someone’s parade? It’s annoying. Why can’t the haters turn themselves into lovers. <3

    Have fun!!

  5. Liz(a) said:

    I try to not do this. I mean, I don’t think I do this. If I do, it’s typically me ranting about how certain peoples who are now famous and whatnot treat me like mud even if I helped them get up to the top. That part sucks, and I’m jealous of them for being able to be a heartless person and not credit all who helped them.

    Then again, I’m not jealous of them, because I like to believe in karma.

    When I subscribed to blogs’ RSS feeds this year, I decided to leave the toxic peoples out of my subscriptions. Thus far, it’s been rather nice.

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